If You Could Crawl Inside My Head:

You would be confused.  I am Praising God, and questioning God, I am singing to God and I am screaming to God... why is my family going through this!  All of our guts are a mess and we can seem to correct it no matter what.  There are so many trials going on that I don’t care to list them.  BUT, I am still filled with Hope that all things work together for the good of those of who Love Him.  And I do.  He is my redeemer, our redeemer, our healer, our Father, the creator of the universe.  And He chose me before the creation of all things to be called His daughter.  And I am HOPEFUL.  This is only a moment.

there are moments of clarity, and there are moments when I just wish the answers would come and some lasting progress would show itself here.  But I will keep pushing through the treatment, until I push past.  I guess it's kinda like running cross country.  You go all out at first, and then you need to hold back and pace yourself for the final push towards the finish line.  Right now this hill is long and steep and I am trying my hardest to keep pace and not fall back under the pain of pushing past this point.  Because you know whats at the top of the hill....  the down hill where things are easier and your legs aren't burning.